Grace’s Views on Politics and the Current Presidential Campaign

Z- politics, A+ entertainment

I don’t care. I really don’t care. But as I have returned from the dead to write a blog post about this, apparently I do care.

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So it’s been a few months. How have you guys been? Has everything been going well? I’ve practically quit all my TV shows, but I have some ideas about to write. A few. Okay maybe I have no ideas and that’s precisely why I’m writing this blogpost.

A few disclaimers: I haven’t done this in a super long time, so I’ll need to get back into the groove of doing things. Aka writing sarcastic comments and finding relevant gifs. Considering that I’m a teenager though, it should be no problem.

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Anyways, the presidential campaign. America’s reality game show that airs every four years. Don’t think that it’s like a reality game show? Consider the fact that there are eliminations, judges (kind of a stretch, but the people who ask the questions), people drop out, and the people of America vote for their favorite candidate. Honestly it’s literally the recipe of a reality game show. Come on America. Don’t be sheep.

Just like every reality game show, there are archetypes and personalities that are just screaming out our faces. Here are archetypes for the presidential candidates. Bear in mind that I live in liberal New York City, so my viewpoints are a bit biased.

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ANYWAYS, BACK TO THE GOOD OLD LISTS 😀

1. The one that’s here to win. Hillary Clinton through and through. She’s been through this process already and she’s probably completely over losing. She’s here to beat the crap out of her contestants. But of course, there’s always the wild card. Or the underdog. Or the dark horse. Or the Bernie Sanders. Whatever you’d like to call that person.

2. The one that everyone loves to hate. Donald Trump. Obviously. And this guy that everyone loves to hate is the smartest guy. Why? Because he gets all the attention. This guy always makes it into the final round because he racks up viewership and makes things interesting. But how does this guy fare in the final round? Well, if he’s still acting like a completely douchebag at that time, the public will vote him out… I mean, the public won’t vote for him.

3. The dark horse. Bernie Sanders. This guy is so liberal and socialist and actually fights for people’s rights, so it’s no wonder that even though he’s the underdog, he’s still doing super well. You know what I live in New York.

4. The one that doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing. Jeb Bush. Have you seen his eyes?

5. The one that nobody knows exists. Martin O’Malley. And also half of the Republican candidates. Seriously, who are these people? John Kasich? Bobby Jindal? Mike Huckabee? Also I still have no idea who Marco Rubio is. Is he the replacement for the game Marco Polo? MARCO! RUBIO!

6. The one that decides to screw everything up. Thanks Bloomberg. First you left New York with that guy who dropped the groundhog in office (seriously, google Mayor DeBlasio drops groundhog), and now you’re messing with the presidential campaign? You simply KNOW that if you actually run you’re going to take votes away from the Democratic party with your independent-ness. I guess he’s in a New York state of mind. All lone wolf and stuff.

7. The one who always gets in second place. Ted Cruz. Although, he did do okay in Iowa. But no matter how much he wins, he will always be in second place. It’s like Yale. Yale has been better than Harvard, but everyone knows that it’s second place. Second place isn’t a position – it’s a way of life.

8. The one you thought you would like but actually turns out to be a giant douchebag. Ben Carson. ‘Nuff said.

So there you have it. You don’t have to watch this dumb reality TV show. But make sure you watch the final round, because before you know it, one of these idiots is going to be your next president!

I hate politics.

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Weekly Update #1

This is not going to be a regular thing but considering that so much entertainment stuff happened this week both to me and to the fandom world(s) I have to make an update. Actually only three things happened. BUT ALL OF THEM ARE IMPORTANT… sort of. It’s also because I don’t have time to make a legitimate post.

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First of all, Doctor Who season 9 began! I did not watch the pilot. I heard Maisie William is in it and that’s pretty much enough to convince me to watch it… during winter break.

Second of all, I finished Parks and Recreation! For those of you who have never been on tumblr (losers… who have lives), you probably know Parks and Rec as that one show that generates all those posts and stuff. But it’s so much more. Even though it’s a comedy I cried in the last episode. There will probably be a post about it coming up in the next week.

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(Ron is literally my spirit animal)

Third, AKA JESSICA JONES PREMIERE ANNOUNCEMENT IS OUT BEEP BEEP BEEP CODE RED ALERT MARVEL FANDOM ARISE. There are also some photos you can probably find from Google (yes, David Tennant is in it for all of you who don’t know… for some reason a lot of people didn’t know). And here is the premiere announcement below (yes that IS an Of Monsters and Men Song).

NOVEMBER 20TH I’M SO EXCITED. It’s perfect. I want it to be the title sequence. But it’s also not very informative, as Marvel does it’s usual “it’s a teaser and you have to dig for easter eggs” crap. You can hear David Tennant saying “Jessica” four times if you listen carefully enough. But you know, as a professional at this I can extrapolate meaning from extensive wikipedia-ing of Marvel comics. And YouTube comments because those are actually very helpful sometimes. But most of the time it’s haters.

Anyways…

David Tennant is playing this character called the Purple Man (not the Purple Guy, as per Five Nights at Freddy’s… which probably no one knows or cares about), aka Dr. Killgrave. See what I did there with the AKA? Ignore me.

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Purple Man happens to be able to control minds, and in the comic books he especially likes controlling Jessica’s mind, so basically the fact that David Tennant says “Jessica” four times means that HE WILL BE CONTROLLING JESSICA’S MIND. MIND CONTROL MADNESS.

Also Luke Cage is gonna make his first appearance (woot woot get ready for his show next year).

Okay all those obvious things aside (because I don’t want to figure out what the rest of the trailer means), this show looks like it’s going to be as dark and gritty or probably even darker and grittier than Daredevil. *Cue excitement*

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Well that’s all the news from my life!

SEE YA!

The Weekly Suggestion #5

I haven’t done this in ages! As usual. Let’s begin.

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Movie: The Dark Knight Trilogy. I have been mostly or slightly biased towards Marvel until I watched this trilogy. Now I love DC and Marvel equally. The movie was dark, action-packed, and overall fulfilling to the max. I just don’t understand why they decided to recast Batman. Especially with Ben Affleck! Of all people! Also DC’s record of who is in the main DC Cinematic Universe is (dare I say it) way more complicated than Marvel’s. None of the TV shows are in the Cinematic Universe (apparently they have a universe of their own), and The Dark Knight Trilogy isn’t either, so DC has to recast the Flash and Batman… and possibly Oliver Queen at some future time. Sounds fun.

TV Show: Orange is the New Black. I’ve only gotten through something like the first seven episodes, but I can already tell you that this show has the most diverse group of characters I’ve ever seen (in a live-action show, because The Legend of Korra does a fantastic job as well), featuring different races (I’d like to see more Asian people), sexualities, genders, religions, etc. If only Piper would admit that she’s bisexual.

Book: All the Light We Cannot See. As per usual, Grace has only gotten through the first 50 or so pages of this book. Nevertheless, I can already tell you that this book is gorgeously written. It’s a story set in WWII and told through the eyes of two children (I mean, at the end they’re young adults). It may sound like the Book Thief but they’re pretty much nothing alike.

Song: Mr. Brightside. A 2000s-but-definitely-already classic song. I’ve gotten obsessed with it recently. It’s definitely worth your time to listen to it about 1000000 times on repeat. Like I have. Because I’ve been indoors for 72 hours straight doing nothing.

So next week I’m off to China to visit the fam. If you’ve never been to China, then you’re probably jealous of me. If you’ve been to China then you probably feel sorry for me. I’d be excited except I have this horrible cold so I’m not particularly excited for this trip. Anyways, I won’t be blogging next week but I’ll see you the week after!

Bye y’all!

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Doctor, What is Your Catchphrase?

As a reminder that Doctor Who hiatus is more than halfway over (you can either scream in delight or terror based on how well you remember season 8), here’s a I-have-no-idea-what-to-post-this-week-post.

Many people have puzzled over the age long question, the second oldest question in the universe (after Doctor Who)…

What is the doctor’s catchphrase?

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Nine, Ten, and Eleven had pretty obvious ones. Who could forget the cheerful declaration “FANTASTIC”? Everyone remembers Ten’s declaration “ALLONS-Y” that caused French to be the language of love… that’s a lie by the way don’t go repeating that. And of course, Eleven’s phrase, which still rings fresh in our memory (because we miss his season dearly), “GERONIMO!”

When Twelve came along, one of the things I was most excited for was his catchphrase (that is, until season 8 became a huge bust and then I was excited for the monstrosity to end). As the season progressed, it became apparent that Twelve really didn’t have an obvious catchphrase.

Today, I will, once and for all, present the facts and you, the reader, can decide what Twelve’s catchphrase is.

There are several contenders.

There’s the fan favorite:

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But twelve only says this phrase once, so unfortunately this cannot be his catchphrase. Yes I know, I want it to be his catchphrase as well.

There is of course,

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Also quite possibly, just “shut up.” Twelve tends to say this phrase a lot, and Moffat also “confirms” that this is twelve’s catchphrase. However, since Moffat is so bad at writing (what with all his plotholes and his terrible botching of Doctor Who season 8), coupled the fact that he hasn’t made Johnlock canon yet, we can pretty much ignore everything he’s saying.

“Shut up,” however, remains a pretty compelling catchphrase. The Doctor also says “shut up” an incredible 21 times. But did “shut up” stand out to us like the other catchphrases of the Doctor? No. I hardly noticed Twelve saying “shut up” once (except for that one instance up above).

Therefore ignore Moffat.

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And now, you’re probably saying, “But Grace, there are literally no choices left!” Well, let me present to you these statistics.

Twelve has said “shut up” a total of 21 times.

But there is something that Twelve has said 110 times.

That’s right folks, Twelve has uttered a single phrase 110 times.

What’s this phrase you might ask?

CLARA.

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However, Clara is a pretty bad catchphrase (no offense Clara). Although it cannot be denied that “Clara” has been said the most, it’s also true that Nine and Ten both said “Rose” a lot, while Eleven had a plethora of things he called his companions (i.e. impossible girl, soufflé girl, pond, etc).

At this point though, a lot of people have accepted “Clara” to be Twelve’s catchphrase. Let me present this comic:

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Amusing? Yes I think so too.

You’ve been given the facts America… I mean world. NOW DECIDE.

Supergirl: Age of Me

Well, once you’re done watching that monstrosity, let’s discuss. Ok, rather, I rant to you about how terrible I think it is.

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(Disclaimer: this is only about the trailer, and I have no idea how the actual show is going to turn out. But whatever.)

So I watched the trailer at 12:00 one night and once it was over I screamed “WHAT?” so loudly that I woke my entire family up. It was so bad. I was fuming. Whatever.

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While the trailer has terrible timing, terrible acting, terrible cheesiness, and of course that TERRIBLE joke at the end, the worst part of it is the SEXISM.

Go on and tell me that female superheroes “don’t work.” You wanna know why they don’t work? EXHIBIT A: SUPERGIRL TRAILER. NOBODY WANTS TO WATCH IT.

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First of all, the first 2 minutes and 30 seconds of the trailer make Kara (aka Supergirl) this awkward, lovable, dorky girl with… Wait for it… GLASSES! And of course she’s working for some rich bitchy woman who immediately becomes a “villain.” And yes. It takes 2 WHOLE MINUTES for her to discover her superhero identity power things, which for some reason she has decided to keep dormant for 20-or-so-years.

Honestly, if there wasn’t that terrible CGI-ed beginning I might’ve thought it was some sort of romantic comedy. But it isn’t. It’s show so terrible it might as well be a comedy.

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And then, when she discovers her MAGICAL powers she drops the glasses and she’s somehow magically beautiful.

And then, THE WORST PART IN THE TRAILER BY FAR.

The bitchy blond boss decides to name the new heroine “Supergirl,” and Kara disagrees, prompting bitchy blond woman to name off a list of things that makes her “awesome,” trying to make herself “superior” to Kara.

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LET ME MAKE THIS PERFECTLY CLEAR: one woman’s successes does not in ANY WAY hinder another woman. In fact, a woman’s successes should pave the way for other women. Despite how innocently this competition problem may be portrayed in the trailer, the fact of the matter is that this is the exact problem that is hindering all people from equality. We all argue about who is better, who has more problems, etc, etc. This, by the way, is totally stupid, and if the media wants to stop spreading the supposed “awesomeness” of nonsensical bitchy fights, then get rid of this fight between two very, very successful women who are both amazing in their own right.

Okay but whatever the fight is that. BUT IN THE END KARA COULDNT EVEN CHANGE HER NAME TO SUPERWOMAN!

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Oh yes, then, after telling her would-be-boyfriend about her powers, she spends 50 seconds choosing an outfit.

And then, and then, AND THEN! After she tries to join an operation to save the world (or something along those lines) and she gets snubbed (exact lines: “go back to getting someone’s coffee”), she leaves RIGHT AWAY. And then she promptly starts having a pity fest for herself. Well, that’s what the trailer made it seem like anyways.

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Jesus Christ Kara just woman up and pull off a Peggy Carter (who btw is forced to get coffee) and fight your way through the patriarchy and make all the world tremble in front of you and maybe, JUST MAYBE, Supergirl will live to see season 2.

And, finally, there are exactly 12 seconds of her ACTUALLY FIGHTING, which has perhaps the worst special effects and weakest punches I have ever seen in my entire life. Did DC waste all their special effects and stunt double resources on the Flash and Arrow or something, because their fight scenes are top of the notch movie-style, whereas Supergirl is kinda sorta stuck with DOCTOR WHO LEVEL SPECIAL EFFECTS.

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And, of course, in the end, DC has to remind you that Superman is in fact, SUPERIOR to Supergirl, even providing his BABY blanket as her FREAKING CAPE (which also means that she’s OLDER THAN HIM AND SHOULD BE MORE POWERFUL BUT I GUESS NOT).

I’m going to watch some Agent Carter to cool down. GOOD BYE.

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The Weekly Suggestion… #4?

It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these amirite? Well, let’s begin.

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Movie: The Lord of the Rings. No, I have not finished the books. YES, I AM AWARE THE BOOKS ARE GREAT. But watch the movies anyways. It’s a classic and LOTR > Hobbit any day (fight me).

TV Show: Agents of SHIELD. Apparently it’s going to be very related to the greater MCU. I’m only 10 minutes into it and SPOILER ALERT: PHIL COULSON IS ALIVE! Does anyone die in Marvel? Oh yeah. Captain America Civil War -_-

Book: Where’d You Go, Bernadette? It’s an epistolary, which means (for those of you who are not educated in the fine arts of English… or in my case, googling) it’s a novel written with a bunch of letters and documents. I mean, since it’s based in modern day there are emails and stuff. And there’s some non-letter narrative in there too. But whatever. IT’S FUNNY. READ IT.

Song: Flightless Bird, American Mouth. Even its use in the Twilight Saga will NEVER DETER MY LOVE FOR THE SONG! The lyrics make absolutely no sense… aka it’s great.

Oh yes, and if you haven’t seen Taylor Swift’s new music video, watch it here. I mean, it’s highly unlikely that you’re not one of the 24,000,000 views (I wonder what the probability is…), but it’s worth a rewatch anyways.

K BYE

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Daredevil: A Catholic Lawyer Vigilante… :)

Grade: A+++++

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Isn’t it gorgeous.

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Huzzah! It’s Marvel’s newest Netflix original series, which was completely overshadowed by Age of Ultron (which I can’t see until next week URGGGH) even though it came out on April 10th.

This show is probably totally overrated but I don’t really care because IT’S NOT OVERRATED TO ME!

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Contrary to the belief of imdb, Daredevil is not in fact about the Flash, but it’s actually about Daredevil! I know, I’m sure you guys are shocked to learn this piece of news, but The Flash tells the story of the Flash.

And for you disbelievers out there about the IMDB falsehood, let me present to you, figure 1:

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But enough about the discrepancies of the internet these days. It’s time for the review!

Daredevil takes place in Hells Kitchen, aka very close to the place where the Avengers demolished everything. It tells the story of a lawyer named Matt Murdock. A very, very hot lawyer, who also happens to be VERY shirtless a lot of the time. While a lawyer by day, he’s a vigilante by night, going around and fighting crime in a black mask. Eventually, Matt discovers that the majority of crime seems to be centered around a certain group of people, who all seem to be following a single person whose name I cannot mention because then the entire series will be spoiled.

Fine, it’s Kingpin. But they don’t actually refer to the character as Kingpin in the series so I get a pass.

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Matt also happens to be a devout Catholic, which is quite the struggle considering he beats up people every night. Anyhow, his Catholicism causes him to grapple with what’s right and what’s wrong – how far would he be willing to go to keep his city safe?

Surprisingly, the villain gets quite a bit of fleshing-out as well. Kingpin gets almost as much as a childhood backstory as Matt himself does. He also gets a gorgeous and loyal wife  whom he loves dearly. His intentions for the city are… uh… the same as Matt’s (A+ intentions, D execution)? And… uh… you start feeling bad for the dude.

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The directors or writers or whatever said that the show would “blur the line between good and evil.” WELL, THEY WEREN’T LYING.

In fact, most of the characters get their own complicated stories, which weave and intertwine with other characters’ stories. Karen Page, Matt’s assistant in his law firm, goes out hunting the truth by herself. Foggy Nelson, Matt’s partner, cleverly manages to wheedle information out of his ex-girlfriend (ikr how r00d).

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And now for TOP 5 REASONS WHY YOU MUST WATCH DAREDEVIL.

1) The premise of the show is extremely dark and gritty… literally. I mean, it’s so dark sometimes that you can’t even see what’s happening (you’ve just got to turn your brightness all the way up). It’s like Marvel’s preparing to mourn for Captain America’s impending death. At least the darkness makes the show seem more realistic and epic anyways. As for the grittiness… well, it’s about as bloody as you can get outside of the land known as HBO.

2) The fight scenes and stunt scenes are insanely good… and there are a lot of them. It’s like Captain America: Winter Soldier elevator and highway fight scene level… well at least close to it (nothing can beat Captain America: Winter Soldier). For those of you who don’t speak Marvel Cinematic Universe, allow me to present to you, figure 2:

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That, my friends, is the highway fight scene.

3) Strategies and corruption. Like, the amount of people Kingpin has paid off to represent him is insane: policemen, media peoples, judges, even senators. He’s able to twist people’s public images and dispose of anyone who might reveal him. Gives you an insight to how much power rich people have, eh?

4) An excellent buildup for the next season. Season 1 was insane, but it also left dozens of opportunities for the next few seasons. Meaning, either Marvel will screw it up completely because there are way too many things to do, or, knowing Marvel’s excellent track record in the last 7 or so years, Marvel will make it TOTALLY AWESOME!

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5) Crossovers with other Marvel Netflix shows and connections to the greater Marvel Comic Universe. Which, if you’re a die-hard Marvel or just MCU fan, should excite you just as much as it excited me. First of all, there are 4 other superhero shows coming along on Netflix: AKA Jessica Jones (which stars David Tennant), Luke Cage, Iron Fist, and The Defenders. The Defenders is a team-up of the aforementioned superheroes plus Daredevil. Yes, I was brought to tears of joy when I found that out. NO YOU CANNOT JUDGE ME.

And of course, most importantly, Daredevil is canon to the greater MCU universe. For those of you who do not speak fandom, canon means that it actually connects to everything (which could potentially lead to crossovers). I will now present to you, figure 3:

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Taken straight from episode 12.

I’m dead. Bye now.

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