Doctor Who: The Magician’s Apprentice…?

I honestly don’t know what that title had to do with any of the episode. I mean, the Doctor doesn’t even have his Magician-ish outfit anymore. But, whatever.

In the wise words of Sherlock Holmes, it was “surprisingly okay.” In fact, I would go as far as to say it has entered the realm of A-range ratings, but as you can see I have abstained from grading this episode. Because honestly it’s probably all downhill from here.

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Nevertheless…

The Magician’s Apprentice is an episode filled with so many plot twists from the very beginning (actually like the first 5 minutes probably). It keeps you on the edge of your seat and the episode is actually exciting: there’s not really a point in it where there’s a giant collapse and disappointment (like the entirety of season 8). However, it’s so filled with plot twists that I can’t really explain anything without spoiling. So, I won’t spoil more than one thing, which you guys probably already know about anyway. This one thing is the very bestest thing in the entire episode, the one thing that will save Doctor Who, the one thing that will make Season 9 worth watching.

Yes, that one thing is Missy.

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In a shocking turn of events, Missy is not dead. I’m sure we’re all so shocked at this because it is quite unlike Moffat to bring back dead characters. Rory, for example. One death and then he was gone.

Anyways, Doctor Who made the incredibly wise decision (I am not being sarcastic anymore) to bring back the Master. Or the Mistress, or Missy, whatever you prefer to call her… or him (there aren’t enough pronouns in the world). The greatest sadness we’ve had to bear is that although she appeared frequently in season 8, they were mainly cameo appearances.

The Magician’s Apprentice, however, has really brought the character into main status. She’s filled with the most amazing sarcastic comments and she’s basically one of the best characters I’ve ever seen in Doctor Who. Yes. She has made that exclusive favorite Doctor Who characters list (not including the Doctor). It now contains Missy, Jack Harkness, and Donna Noble. Now imagine all of them in one episode with River. The amount of flirting and sass that would happen.

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Ah, if only RTD’s Who was connected to Moffat’s Who with something other than the Doctor. Or the Master now. Or Oods. Or Weeping Angels. Or Daleks. Or Cybermen. Or other stuff. Okay I mean there should be a return of the companions. But I’m getting off topic.

Missy is a character that no one wanted but everyone needed. She’s un-ironically evil but still hangs out with the “good” characters. She has a personality but doesn’t feel remorse. She’s sassy and sarcastic but not in a I’m-doing-this-to-hide-my-emotions way. She doesn’t even really have a deep, dark secret or any remotely human-like feelings (you know, like the Master in RTD… or the Doctor), but you can’t call her one dimensional either. She’s just Missy: the arch-nemesis and best friend, unbothered by everything except for the absolute will to destroy and be besties with the Doctor at the same time.

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Basically, besides the fact that the episode was pretty exciting and everything, you should watch it because of Missy. Missy is love. Missy is life. OH MISSY YOU SO FINE YOU SO FINE YOU BLOW MY MIND. HEY MISSY.

OKAY BYE NOW! Stay tuned for Doctor Who tomorrow (and pray that it’s as good as this episode)

Weekly Update #1

This is not going to be a regular thing but considering that so much entertainment stuff happened this week both to me and to the fandom world(s) I have to make an update. Actually only three things happened. BUT ALL OF THEM ARE IMPORTANT… sort of. It’s also because I don’t have time to make a legitimate post.

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First of all, Doctor Who season 9 began! I did not watch the pilot. I heard Maisie William is in it and that’s pretty much enough to convince me to watch it… during winter break.

Second of all, I finished Parks and Recreation! For those of you who have never been on tumblr (losers… who have lives), you probably know Parks and Rec as that one show that generates all those posts and stuff. But it’s so much more. Even though it’s a comedy I cried in the last episode. There will probably be a post about it coming up in the next week.

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(Ron is literally my spirit animal)

Third, AKA JESSICA JONES PREMIERE ANNOUNCEMENT IS OUT BEEP BEEP BEEP CODE RED ALERT MARVEL FANDOM ARISE. There are also some photos you can probably find from Google (yes, David Tennant is in it for all of you who don’t know… for some reason a lot of people didn’t know). And here is the premiere announcement below (yes that IS an Of Monsters and Men Song).

NOVEMBER 20TH I’M SO EXCITED. It’s perfect. I want it to be the title sequence. But it’s also not very informative, as Marvel does it’s usual “it’s a teaser and you have to dig for easter eggs” crap. You can hear David Tennant saying “Jessica” four times if you listen carefully enough. But you know, as a professional at this I can extrapolate meaning from extensive wikipedia-ing of Marvel comics. And YouTube comments because those are actually very helpful sometimes. But most of the time it’s haters.

Anyways…

David Tennant is playing this character called the Purple Man (not the Purple Guy, as per Five Nights at Freddy’s… which probably no one knows or cares about), aka Dr. Killgrave. See what I did there with the AKA? Ignore me.

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Purple Man happens to be able to control minds, and in the comic books he especially likes controlling Jessica’s mind, so basically the fact that David Tennant says “Jessica” four times means that HE WILL BE CONTROLLING JESSICA’S MIND. MIND CONTROL MADNESS.

Also Luke Cage is gonna make his first appearance (woot woot get ready for his show next year).

Okay all those obvious things aside (because I don’t want to figure out what the rest of the trailer means), this show looks like it’s going to be as dark and gritty or probably even darker and grittier than Daredevil. *Cue excitement*

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Well that’s all the news from my life!

SEE YA!

Doctor, What is Your Catchphrase?

As a reminder that Doctor Who hiatus is more than halfway over (you can either scream in delight or terror based on how well you remember season 8), here’s a I-have-no-idea-what-to-post-this-week-post.

Many people have puzzled over the age long question, the second oldest question in the universe (after Doctor Who)…

What is the doctor’s catchphrase?

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Nine, Ten, and Eleven had pretty obvious ones. Who could forget the cheerful declaration “FANTASTIC”? Everyone remembers Ten’s declaration “ALLONS-Y” that caused French to be the language of love… that’s a lie by the way don’t go repeating that. And of course, Eleven’s phrase, which still rings fresh in our memory (because we miss his season dearly), “GERONIMO!”

When Twelve came along, one of the things I was most excited for was his catchphrase (that is, until season 8 became a huge bust and then I was excited for the monstrosity to end). As the season progressed, it became apparent that Twelve really didn’t have an obvious catchphrase.

Today, I will, once and for all, present the facts and you, the reader, can decide what Twelve’s catchphrase is.

There are several contenders.

There’s the fan favorite:

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But twelve only says this phrase once, so unfortunately this cannot be his catchphrase. Yes I know, I want it to be his catchphrase as well.

There is of course,

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Also quite possibly, just “shut up.” Twelve tends to say this phrase a lot, and Moffat also “confirms” that this is twelve’s catchphrase. However, since Moffat is so bad at writing (what with all his plotholes and his terrible botching of Doctor Who season 8), coupled the fact that he hasn’t made Johnlock canon yet, we can pretty much ignore everything he’s saying.

“Shut up,” however, remains a pretty compelling catchphrase. The Doctor also says “shut up” an incredible 21 times. But did “shut up” stand out to us like the other catchphrases of the Doctor? No. I hardly noticed Twelve saying “shut up” once (except for that one instance up above).

Therefore ignore Moffat.

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And now, you’re probably saying, “But Grace, there are literally no choices left!” Well, let me present to you these statistics.

Twelve has said “shut up” a total of 21 times.

But there is something that Twelve has said 110 times.

That’s right folks, Twelve has uttered a single phrase 110 times.

What’s this phrase you might ask?

CLARA.

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However, Clara is a pretty bad catchphrase (no offense Clara). Although it cannot be denied that “Clara” has been said the most, it’s also true that Nine and Ten both said “Rose” a lot, while Eleven had a plethora of things he called his companions (i.e. impossible girl, soufflé girl, pond, etc).

At this point though, a lot of people have accepted “Clara” to be Twelve’s catchphrase. Let me present this comic:

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Amusing? Yes I think so too.

You’ve been given the facts America… I mean world. NOW DECIDE.

Why (the Rest of) This Year is Going to be TOTALLY AWESOME

It’s been half a year or something and I still don’t know how to properly capitalize the titles to posts.

Well. Anyways. HI! I’m here procrastinating right now and attempting to watch Star Wars for about the 10th time (I WILL DO IT THIS TIME). And that means that this post will probably make very little sense.

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However, as you can see from the title, the boringness that has been this year’s entertainment is almost over. I mean Supernatural and the Flash did sustain me somewhat. Also the attempt to catch up on Game of Thrones before season 5 started (I failed miserably). And yeah, yeah we’ve had Cinderella I guess. And Insurgent. And Kingsman I suppose. But none of that even compares to the total epicness that will be the next 2/3rds of 2015.

And now, I present to you: A HIGHLY BIASED LIST OF THE TOP 10 THINGS THAT ARE GOING TO HAPPEN (or are currently happening), which should probably be retitled as THE TOP 10 THINGS THAT I’M MOST EXCITED ABOUT FOR THE REST OF THIS YEAR.

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10) Jurassic World – This is basically on my list only because I needed a #10. The special effects look kind of bad. Other stuff that could’ve replaced this movie include: Inside Out, Terminator Genisys, Pitch Perfect 2, Tomorrowland, and Pan.

9) Game of Thrones Season 5 – Okay I’ll explain: this is only #9 because it’s already happening. And if you’re a real fan, you’re probably already watching it. If you’re a fake fan like me you’ll still be stuck on season 3 (whoops).

8) Doctor Who Season 9 – I’m not actually sure if you should be excited about this or not. If it’s any bit as bad as the last season you might have to pull an Oedipus and gouge your eyes out. DON’T MARRY YOUR MOTHER THOUGH.

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7) Paper Towns – I really liked the book, but I’m kind of skeptical about the movie because how on earth is the movie going to capture the thoughts running through Q’s head all the time. Also John Green doesn’t seem as excited for it as he did for TFIOS. But still – I’m pumped.

6) Ant-Man – Well after Marvel trolled us for about half a year we finally got a semi-decent trailer. And, to be honest, it looks okay. It seems like a very light-hearted and funny film… which means that Age of Ultron is going to break our souls and Ant-Man is going to try to heal us (but that’ll never work).

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5) Fantastic Four – As if we needed another non-canon Marvel film. But anyways, REBOOTS FOR THE WIN! And apparently these guys needed it because their original movie sucked. Also please stop freaking about the fact that the Human Torch is black because I DON’T UNDERSTAND THE ISSUE HERE.

4) Mockingjay Part 2 – I may have forgotten about this movie but let me tell you I am ready. I am so ready for the trailer. Give me a trailer. Or a teaser. Or even just a poster. JUST GIVE ME SOMETHING.

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3) Star Wars: Episode VII – After 30 years of waiting since the first trilogy for the old characters to return, 10 years of waiting since the second trilogy for Star Wars to Return, and one close plane crash of Han Solo who really should be adept with aircrafts at this point (too soon? nah he’s alive), the years of waiting have come to an end. For all you Star Warsians (what do the fans name themselves?) out there, if the trailer made me freak out then I can’t imagine how excited you guys must be.

2) Sherlock Christmas Special – After 2 long years of dedicated waiting (Star Wars fans ain’t got nothing against us), the time has finally come for us to break tumblr again. If you’re new to this fandom, you may not know that we broke tumblr in 2013. Well, we did. And there’s more of us now. So…

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1) Avengers: Age of Ultron – If you’ve stuck around with me since I’ve had this blog, you probably predicted that this was #1. To which I say HEY I’M NOT THAT PREDICTABLE. But anyways, get yourselves ready because by the looks of all 100 trailers and all 100 infuriating teaser clips, this movie’s going to be AWESOME! Also heartbreaking. Very heartbreaking. TOO HEARTBREAKING 😦

NOW GO FORTH AND MARK YOUR CALENDARS!

Doctor Who Christmas Special: Last Christmas, aka Inception

Grade: B+

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This post contains spoilers if you actually care about Doctor Who not getting spoiled and haven’t watched the episode, or if you don’t own a tumblr.

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I think I’ve made it pretty obvious that I pretty much hate Doctor Who now, but in terms of the Christmas special, it was, as Sherlock puts it, “surprisingly okay.”

I actually find Sherlock’s eyeball tea to be a pretty good metaphor, with Moffat burning your eyeballs out with his sappy story lines and whatnot and then drowning you in hot tea while he smirks from the sidelines and stabs more plot holes into his already failing scripts.

But enough of that.

Last Christmas starts off with Clara finding Santa on her rooftop (with some snotty elves and several horrible CGI reindeer), who’s crashing arrival is immediately followed by the Doctor’s arrival. Then, Clara and the Doctor go off to some mysterious base at the North Pole, where they meet up with a team of research scientists who apparently know nothing of what they’re doing. I mean who understands science nowadays anyways.

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The group of scientists consists of four people (well eight, but that’s a story for another time… aka you should watch the episode if you haven’t already done so). First, an old grandma lady who doesn’t seem to do much. Second, an outspoken, short-haired girl who’s obviously there for comic relief. Third, a bossy young lady who’s pretty much cut out to be president (or prime minister in this case I suppose). And finally, an older, constantly hungry, very pervy old man, who apparently acts sexually towards the short-haired girl, but Moffat conveniently glosses over that moment.

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Anyways, the Doctor discovers the existence of these creatures called “dream crabs,” which basically suck themselves onto your face and induce very real dreams. Basically, the Doctor Who Christmas special is based around the idea of dreaming, and of dreams within dreams. You’re dreaming. I’m dreaming. I’m waking up from a dream but I’m still dreaming.

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Christopher Nolan called. He wants his story back.

Honestly, the premise of Last Christmas is incredibly similar to Inception. They’re both based off of dreams within other dreams. In both, dream time is much faster than real time. I actually think they used the same figures: 5 minutes in the real world is an hour in the dream world. In the end of both stories, you’re still not 100% sure if the characters are in the dream or not (seriously if you think that the tangerine on Clara’s windowsill doesn’t mean Santa, you’re fooling yourself).

The only real difference between the two stories is that in Inception, the characters are racing against the clock to get deeper into the dream, whereas in Last Christmas, the characters are racing to get out of the dream. Oh yeah, also Inception is way better than Last Christmas.

However, the similarity between Last Christmas and Inception isn’t the only thing that could downgrade this Christmas special to a B+.

First of all, there were plot holes and unanswered plot questions, as in all Moffat-related things. The biggest question in my case was what happened to all those scientists? After Clara and the Doctor woke up the last time, Moffat conveniently decided to ignore the three scientists. Were they figments of Clara and the Doctor’s dreams? Were they still dreaming? We may never know

There is also, of course, Moffat giving more signals to drive away kids.

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I mean, after Dark Water and Death In Heaven, it’s a miracle that kids continue to watch Doctor Who. Nevertheless, Moffat commits the greatest crime of all towards children with Last Christmas.

HE TELLS THE WORLD THAT SANTA ISN’T REAL.

According to Last Christmas, Santa only exists in the dream world, and he’s a ridiculous construct from our minds. Well, Moffat, I’m sorry that your parents probably spilled the beans to you when you were but a wee lad, but just because your childhood sucked, that doesn’t mean you’re allowed to ruin it for the thousands of children who excitedly crowded around the TV to watch your terrible episode.

What happened to all the happy sappy doctors? Eleven himself probably believed in Santa. And now, here we are, with Doctor Who perpetrating that Santa doesn’t exist. What has the world come to?

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However, despite all these complaints, there must be some good in the show for me to award it a B+, instead of the customary C+ that I reserve solely for Moffat Who.

Yes, Last Christmas had a pretty dark and depressing twist (which was clearly not meant for young children) that appealed to me. Before you tell me I’m going through my scene phase, 1) I have no idea what a scene phase is and 2) I’m well aware I’m going through a scene phase since the other day I decorated a gingerbread house with a couple of my friends and it ended up looking more like a sacrifice to satan.

The story line, although copied, was compelling nevertheless (I mean I loved Inception, so I was bound to at least like this episode).

And finally, Moffat was ultimately once again able to toy with my emotions.

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I probably started crying around the part where Danny Pink appeared in Clara’s dream. This part:

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And then Danny trying to make Clara live a happy life and stop thinking about him. And then the penultimate scene where old Clara celebrates Christmas with the Doctor, and it’s like the last Christmas with Clara and Eleven… I was just bawling my eyes out. It kind of reminded me of

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All at the same time.

If you recognize all three screencaps, then props to you. If not, then you clearly need to delve into the fandom world more.

In comparison to other Doctor Who Christmas specials, this one isn’t the worst, but it isn’t the greatest. It places somewhere around the middle for me (probably around 5th or 6th). Twelve still has a long way to go though, and probably many more Christmas specials to be in (well, at least I hope he has many more Christmas specials at any rate).

If the gods bless us (and if Moffat decides to retire) in 2015, Doctor Who will be significantly better than it was towards the end of 2014. To a new year, a new doctor, and (hopefully) a better season of Doctor Who.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Doctor Who Season 8: Great or Hate?

Grade: B- / C+

For all you non-whovians out there, this video basically sums up the basics of Doctor Who: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5j7fouE4f_k

(Yes I know. Now you want to watch it.)

Well, that video stops before 12’s era begins. But that’s okay, because 12’s era is unfortunately mediocre.

I myself started Doctor Who pretty late – 11’s era was already over and I rushed through (new) Doctor Who before 12’s era began. 9 was just a great beginning, 10 was my favorite doctor, and 11 was just a bubbly and happy era.

And then it was 12’s time to shine.

Let’s just say that his entrance was pretty epic. This gif probably sums it up:

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Actually that gif pretty much sums up 12.

So the day was set for 12’s era to begin and I was excited out of my mind… and I mean EXCITED. “AUGUST 23” was capitalized on my autocorrect, and I watched all the trailers at least 10 times. When 8:00 came around on the premiere I ran out of my room, jumped on the couch, and turned the volume up to the highest it could go.

But let’s just say for the record once the episode had finished I was kind of like

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I hoped the season would get better, but Moffat’s writing skills seem to be declining.

First of all, most of the episodes had some great build-ups with some really, REALLY terrible endings. Time Heist, for example, was just a really great episode until the end, where I was just like

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And let me tell you. Not the good kind of “what?”

The season dragged on until the finale. I have to say, the first part of the finale was nice (but really predictable), but the second part of the finale was just a huge let-down.

Now I know I’ve been saying that Doctor Who season 8 has been a boatload of crap so far, but let’s just say for the record that it’s not actually an entire boatload of crap: it has one gem. And that gem is Peter Capaldi.

Peter Capaldi is an amazing doctor. He’s basically the reason why the grade for this season is not a C-. The doctor transforms completely from his earlier, bubbly incarnation to a very sarcastic and rather outwardly cold doctor (don’t worry he’s nice on the inside :)). I mean:

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Anyone like that is a hero in my eyes.

Well, now that season 8 is over, the next thing coming up is the Christmas special. Hopefully it’ll be better. Please save Doctor Who for me Peter.